You Are Special! Build Your Own Self-Esteem
(c) Judy H. Wright http://www.judyhwright.com
As an infant, you were whole in spirit and filled to the brim with potential. Your self-esteem was over the top. You did not need to be told to believe you were special. It never even occurred to you that there was such a thing as failure or disappointment. You went for what you wanted with enthusiasm and joy.
Perhaps you were given messages, both verbally and non-verbal, that you were a nuisance, unwanted, and unloved. Those negative experiences would continue to build into what you thought about yourself. Each successive bad experience would reinforce your self-esteem.
Importance of Positive Parenting
Childhood messages are imprinted on our memories. Dr. Margaret Muhler, a noted child psychologist, said the messages we receive in the first three years of life are the loudest voices in our adult minds. The negativity and labels we hear as children can follow us on every path of adulthood. Sometimes you will hear the same words or labels that your parent used to mold your behavior come out of the mouths of a boss or spouse.
But you have to understand that our caregivers did the best they could with the knowledge they had at that time. Forgive them for saying and doing things that hurt your feelings or stunted your courage. Examine your belief system and discard those things that are not for your highest good right now.
If others in your life use derogatory words or labels, speak up assertively and ask for their respect. We are treated by others only the way we allow them to treat us.
Build Your Own Positive Self-Esteem
Your self-esteem and self-worth is not founded on the approval of others. A person who has built their self-esteem is assertive and respectful of the weaknesses and strengths of each person, including himself. He or she has learned to approve and take responsibility for personal choices.
The respect you desire is from within. Even if no one else is applauding and encouraging you (please know that I am your advocate) you have unique gifts and talents. You have something valuable to share with the world that no one else can contribute. Are you special? You bet you are!
The core of confidence that you are indeed special and a gift to the world comes from building layer upon layer of positive experiences. Someone once told me that the secret to success is to find things you love to do and are good at doing. Then, just keep doing them again and again. You will find that you are building that core of self-esteem and the idea that you are unique and special.
- What messages did you get from your parents about who you are?
- What labels did you hear and then take on yourself that you still believe?
- Where those messages of self-worth accurate then? Are they serving your highest good now? Are you ready to let them go?
If you have enjoyed this article, you are invited and encouraged to go to http://www.Bouncebackperson.com to claim a free eBook and read excerpts from Judy Helm Wright’s latest book Out of Balance? Be a Bounce Back Person. You will be glad you did.