Bullies & Victims-So Many Different Ways
Bullying is not strictly a behaviour of the young and not all bullying involves fighting. Bullying, in all forms, is an attempt to steal power from someone else thus empowering the bully. There is no single reason why some people attempt to take advantage of others, but those who intimidate and manipulate often use aggressive tactics.
Imbalance of Power
Bullying can be described as aggressive behaviour that is intentional and involves an imbalance of power or strength. Often patterns of abusive behaviour becomes evident over time. Victims or targets sometimes downplay the violence and damage to their self esteem, hoping it will just go away or at least get better with time. Bullying and aggressive action rarely stop without some sort of intervention.
There doesn’t appear to be a single type of person who becomes the target of bullies or the victims of their aggressive attacks.
6 Types of Bullies. Are You a Victim?
You may want to check out the six types of bullies and their methods of intimidation to see if you can recognize when and if you have been the victim of a bully.
The following are the most common traits of bullies:
The Physical Bully
- hits, kicks, pushes, spits, and/or intimidates
- steals possessions
- forces others do things they don’t want to do themselves
The Verbal Bully
- engages in name calling, humiliating, teasing, and insults
- uses sarcasm and pointed jokes to point out flaws in their targets personality
- makes degrading comments about victims dress or appearance
The Non-Verbal Bully
- mimics physical activity and/or disabilities of others
- makes offensive gestures and facial expressions
- turns their head or body away when victim is speaking (giving the cold shoulder)
- uses threatening body language (such as standing in the victims personal space, and using postures that make the themselves look physically larger than their victim)
The Social Bully
- refuses to talk or acknowledge their victim
- spreads rumours or innuendoes about others
- makes someone behave or dress in a manner that bully determines
- invites others to an event or party in front of victim, while excluding the victim
- talks directly to the victim about a social event they have been excluded from
The Sexual Bully
- engages in unwanted physical contact
- makes vulgar remarks and gestures toward others
- calls others by sexual names or remarking on sexual orientation
- takes photos or videos of their victim in a compromising situation and threatens to share it
- manipulates situations to gain sexual favours
The Cyber-Bully or Technological Bully
- sends mean, vulgar or threatening messages using cell phones or through text and instant messaging
- texts or forwards private messages to others
- sends unflattering photos to others or sexually suggestive photos to the victim
- pretends to be someone else to make their victim look bad
- intentionally excludes someone from an online group
- posts derogatory or inflammatory messages on social media sites (ie: Facebook, YouTube, and MySpace)
- impersonates someone else when chatting through instant messaging to gain information or humiliate
Hold Bullies Accountable
While researching my latest book on cyber-bullying, I have found bullies almost never stop their aggressive and abusive behaviour without intervention.
Bullies DO NOT stop bullying; they just get bigger and more devious in their approach.
If you recognize that you have been bullied in the past, empower yourself now. Set boundaries and become more assertive in your interpersonal relationships.
You can do it, I have confidence in you.
http://www.UseEncouragingWords.com claim a free ebook to assist you in motivating positive action in all communications
Judy Helm Wright is a noted author, speaker and relationship coach. Schedule a free session with her at http://www.judyhwright.com[contact-form-7 404 "Not Found"]